Finding Strength In Your Softness
Feeling the world deeply around you, having high sensitivity and being a gentle soul is one of your greatest strengths. We need more softness in this world, more grace, compassion, forgiveness, and peace. I’ve recently read the book Highly Sensitive People in an Insensitive World by Ilse Sand. Not all…
Don’t Forget Your Roots
Growing up we would go to the beach each year on Christmas day. In New Zealand, Christmas is celebrated during the summertime, so instead of spending it in the snow, you spend it in the sand and sea. The holidays remind me of the smell of the ocean, eating fish…
Comparison Is The Thief Of Joy
I recently watched Joika a film based on a true story of Joy Womack, one of the first American woman to graduate from the Bolshoi Ballet. She goes through the gruelling process of extreme competitiveness, intense pressure and the need for mental resilience in the ballet world where perfection is…
Music Is About Ears Not Eyes
In the film Begin Again, Keira Knightley’s character says, “Music is about ears not eyes.” It’s a simple reminder that music is meant to be felt and experienced. Just as we shouldn’t judge a book by its cover, we should value music for its story telling. Some of today’s music…
Five Benefits Of Living With Less
Living with less means creating space for the important aspects of our lives that bring greater value. We are increasingly encouraged to consume more in a tech-saturated environment, where the rise of targeted advertising is driving growth in our spending. The emphasis on needing more things in our lives to…
Making Friends As An Adult
Friendships have been something I’ve struggled with since I was a child. In kindergarten, I often found it easier to play alone. It felt easier to play with the guinea pigs and rabbits. People seemed unpredictable and, at times, untrustworthy. There was a deep pain in feeling left out, and…
The Courage To Be Disliked
No one is thinking about you, nor are you thinking about them. That’s the magic of it: everyone is focusing on their own lives. I’ve often experienced intense social anxiety, but the reminder that most people are busy preoccupied with themselves is a massive relief. Social anxiety tricks you into…
What Really Matters In Life
As young adults, we spend much of our time working. Money is a tool we need to survive, live comfortably and perhaps set aside for enjoyment or fleeting materialistic pleasures. But sometimes I wonder, what really matters in life? There are moments where I contemplate how superficial our society can…
A Love Letter To Wellington
When the plane starts shaking in the windy skies you know you’ve arrived in Wellington. As you peek outside the window, the vast ocean meets the harbour and there are numerous tiny houses dotted on the hills. It feels like you’re looking at a small town rather than the capital…
The Joy Of Being At Home
The grey clouds blanketed the sky and I could feel the rain dripping on my head and the immense relief of arriving home. A flash of lightening filled the room and the thunder roared loudly outside. There’s a sense of security and comfort being at home. Home can mean so…
Improving Your Mother Tongue
It’s common for those who grew up in a different country to their parents to lose some or all of their mother tongue. It’s natural to want to speak the language that is largely spoken in your environment as it helps you communicate with the people you interact with. This…
The Cat Who Saved Books
Ritaro is the shy young protagonist in the book who rarely goes to school or socialises. He recently loses his grandfather and inherits his old bookstore and is met with overwhelming grief. Shortly after, a talking cat called Tiger appears and Ritaro enters four labyrinths where he discovers the ways…
Clothing Thoughts
I was recently watching a video which made me think about how important it is to dress well. What we wear reveals how we feel about ourselves and how we’d like to present ourselves to the world. The video made me reflect on the popularity of dressing casually, the rise…
Living A Slow-Paced Life
There have been many moments where rushing feels like progress but the result ends up being less than satisfactory. Slowing down is when things are able to come into fruition in a natural way. Think of a small seed in the soil that weathers through the stormy nights and sunny…
How Do I Pronounce Your Name?
Growing up in a Western country it may have been a common experience to hear the teacher mispronounce your name. Particularly if it’s a name that’s not so common or a name from a different culture. My Chinese surname was commonly mispronounced but it was not common for people to…
I’ve Been Decluttering My Wardrobe
Clothing is one of the largest polluters in the world and much of the clothing worn and unworn end up in landfills. When I think of why we end up buying excess clothing it makes me think of the quote by Dave Ramsey: ‘We buy things we don’t need with…
The Joy Of Missing Out
The ability to embrace the art of doing nothing allows us to appreciate periods of solitude. Social media has contributed to the rise of consumer culture and social pressures. These pressures can cause stress and a distraction from what is important in our lives. The concept of missing out is…
Five Reasons To Improve Your Chinese
Growing up in New Zealand, I learned to speak Mandarin Chinese first. It was difficult to maintain interest as a child when my classmates, friends, and teachers were speaking English. I remember once I started going to school my Chinese regressed. I’d go to Saturday Chinese classes unable to recognize…
Five Ways to Care About Our Planet
I recently watched Our Planet on Netflix and you can see the incredible beauty in nature, the vastness of the ocean and the animals that wander the earth. The series makes one more conscious of the impacts of climate change and how human beings have significantly impacted the planet. There’s…
Spending Less Time On Your Phone
A century ago, it would’ve seemed strange to picture photos and artwork with people holding a phone in their hand with their heads bowed down. Today, it’s a norm to walk down the street messaging someone. I miss the days when phones weren’t such a massive part of our lives.…
Why I Stopped Going to Church
Going to church every Sunday began when I was younger up until my early twenties. The recent news about Hillsong and Arise church this year sparked memories from my own experiences of growing up going to church. I’d previously attended Hillsong when I lived in Sydney and attended Arise church…
We Don’t Need A Lot To Be Happy
When we come into the world we have nothing but ourselves. When we leave this planet we have nothing but ourselves. We already have everything that we need within our body, mind, heart, and soul from the moment we enter the world. We are already enough. The trees don’t ask…
Being Soft-spoken and Assertive
Has there been a time when you’ve felt unheard or ignored? Has there been an instance where you try to chime in only to have someone interrupt you or ignore what you had said altogether? It is frustrating and it can make us feel as though nobody cares about our…
Playing The Piano After A Decade
Do you remember the first time you saw a music performance? I remember watching The Phantom of the Opera and I immediately fell in love with it. As a child, I’d play piano music out loud and dance around the house, listen to tapes for hours, and watch musicals and…
Spending Time Offline
The greatest joys in life are often simple things. Thinking about a life offline makes me feel nostalgic as I transport to a time when we listened to tapes, spent lots of time at the beach and hung out with the neighbours. Recently, I’ve been thinking about our screen time…
What Is Essential Is Invisible To The Eye
No matter where we are in the world, it’s the state of mind that you’re in that determines the life you want to live. When you’re filled with gratitude and love, you appreciate what you already have. Whereas, if you’re filled with fear, you can feel a sense of lack…
Do You Eat The Same Breakfast Everyday?
Drinking a cup of strong black coffee on an empty stomach is a common morning routine for many people. The consumption of caffeine can have weird effects on some people. I find having caffeine can make me shaky and energetic in the short term but it can impact my sleep.…
How To Escape From Prison
Discovering that I had a mental illness was eye-opening and brought clarity to the lens I had spent seeing the world throughout my life. The greatest freedom is making the decision to change even though it’s terrifying and confronting as hell. The truth is you are not powerless and you…
The Art Of Slow Reading
Your eyes skim across the pages of the book from left to right racing towards the finish line in anticipation. You feel a wave of excitement discovering what happens next as you determinedly read quickly through the book. There’s a great sense of accomplishment that comes from finishing a book,…
The Importance Of Doing Nothing
In a heavily switched-on world, it can feel like there’s no pause button. Our phones have become an extension of us most noticeably since the pandemic. The nature of unpredictability has become increasingly more transparent. We live in a society that values busyness and judges the idea of rest by…
The Joy Of Shopping At The Supermarket
A trip to the supermarket felt like an adventure as a child. It still does. Roaming the aisles of different food categories was comforting and easily amusing. Although it’s also been a crazy last two years during the pandemic with crowded aisles, social distancing, panic buying and inflation in prices.…
Time Is How You Spend Your Love
We can spend periods of our lives in a cycle that repeats itself if we don’t seek the desire to change. Nature is always changing and evolving. That is the beautiful part of nature, as it takes its time to achieve great change. How we spend our time is precious.…
The Power Of Humility And Empathy
The greatest wisdom that I hear are often in conversations, such as the other day when my dear friend said to me that “Humility is not seeing yourself as above or below anyone.” We all have our insecurities and flaws. We’re only human. Perfectionism can be the death of our…
The War Of Art And The Pain Of Resistance
A battle with the ego is a daily war, a mere voice in our head and a character that tortures us. The sense of our true self is experienced when we let go of thoughts that aren’t true. Those limiting thoughts creep in to consume us and eat us alive.…
Why Being Nice Is Not Always So Nice
The word nice is often said as a compliment to say that someone is lovely, sweet and friendly. “You are such a nice person!” was a very common phrase I heard growing up. As time passes by, it has been a blessing and a curse that has taught me many…
The Handbook for Highly Sensitive People
Humans are wired to connect and to have authentic conversations. Being sensitive, empathetic and vulnerable are traits that allow us to truly connect with people. A highly sensitive person (HSP) experiences the world through a heightened way through high sensory experiences. This may be through crowded places, strong scents or…
We Live In A Society That Praises Extroverts
Is freedom giving up the need to be understood by everyone? The exhausting part of our daily lives erupt when we feel the need for most people to understand. Every person is deeply complex. The greatest blessing can lie in feeling understood by those who truly care. I was reading…
The Masks We Wear
The complexities of the human condition are deeply reflected in the layers that we each have. The antidote to this are the authentic acts of vulnerability and empathy. The fear of judgment causes us to hide our childlike self under a hard shell, rather than allowing our true self to…
The Art Of Slow Consumption
The psychology of sales, discounts and promotions tend to convince the need to buy in order to feel a sense of satisfaction through saving. This is a powerful marketing tactic as it encourages consumers to buy and therefore increases production demands. The use of special offers and a strong favourable…
Actions Speak Louder Than Words
It’s important to look at what someone does more than what they say. As you grow older, you realise the deeper meaning of the saying that actions speak louder than words. When I was younger, I was very trustworthy of what other people said, and I liked to think everyone…
Five Ways To Live More Sustainably
Every day we have the ability to make choices in what we consume, and what businesses we support with our money. Every product has an environmental footprint, which is why it’s good to purchase items that have minimal packaging. Every person has an impact and affect on the environment, from…
Lack of Privacy
In the digital age, the question of privacy seems to be ever changing, as large corporations have an increasing amount of information on individuals. Reading Ten Arguments for Deleting Your Social Media Accounts Right Now by Jaron Lanier, was eye opening and makes you ask a lot of questions in…
What I Love About Taiwan
Taiwan was once known as Formosa, which means beautiful island. If you ever have the chance to travel and explore the island, you will see its beauty in nature, culture, and people. It is really somewhere you need to come to see and experience for yourself. When I was younger,…
What You Focus On Is How You Will Feel
I was reading a book by Dr. Libby, and I feel like she always has so much wisdom to share. It really resonated with me, when she wrote “What we focus on is what we feel.” There is so much truth to this, and it makes me think about how…
The Importance Of Keeping Your Mother Tongue Alive
Growing up as a bilingual child, I remember my Father telling me that I would speak to the neighbours in Mandarin with a Kiwi accent! It was before I started learning to speak English, and I could only get a grasp of what English sounded like. Mandarin is the first…
Opening Up About Not Feeling Skinny Enough
I feel a little scared to write this. I was around twelve when I started weighing myself on the scales. I ran in the morning before school, and straight after school when I got home. I drank a lot of water and I ate as much as I liked because…
Why We Should Read More Books
The magic of reading is that it allows you to expand your mind, use your imagination and learn something new. It helps you gain a new perspective, go on adventures and leave your comfort zone. Reading brings emotions, thoughts, and ideas to ponder on. Books were a special part of…
The Common Stereotypes About Asian Women
I remember being asked for help in Maths, but Maths and Science were my worst subjects at school. When I gave help to other classmates, I knew my explanation could be wrong, but I knew that I was singled out for help because of the stereotype that Asians are good…
The Art Of Writing On A Piece Of Paper
An action I appreciate so deeply is when someone takes the time to sit down to write a letter or a card. I find that there is somewhat a lost art of writing on a piece of paper, writing a letter to a loved one or making a card for…
A New Zealander’s Story On Being Chinese
I finished reading Being Chinese – A New Zealander’s Story by Helene Wong in two days, and it really made me think about my own background, experiences and thoughts on being a New Zealander. Wong was born in Taihape, with a mixture of second and third generation in her family, and…
The Way We Dress Affects How People Treat Us
Dressing well is a form of self care. I talked to a friend of mine, and we had a really interesting conversation about how we present ourselves, how people treat us when we dress well and she told me how she believes that dressing well is a form of self…
The Reason Asians Carry Umbrellas In The Sun
When I’m living in Taipei, I feel like it’s completely normal to put up an umbrella when the sun is out. It’s very common in many Asian countries, such as Taiwan, Japan and Korea. On Summer days like today, the sun can be very harsh in Auckland, and I tend…
Ethical Fashion And The Rise Of Consumer Culture
Clothes are one of the largest polluters in the world. There is so much we don’t see from the clothes we wear, from the source of the fabric, where the cotton was grown, how much water was used to bring the piece of clothing to life, what environment the worker…
When You’re Asian And More Fluent In English
English was one of my favourite subjects at school as I loved writing essays and reading novels. Although there’s still many aspects where I can improve (note my use of grammar and structuring). My mother tongue is Chinese, as I grew up learning Chinese first before English. We used to…
Why It’s Cool To Spend Time Alone
It seems timely to write this during exam period where I feel like I seem to be spending a lot of time on my own studying. Spending time in your own company is the peace and quiet we all need. Everyone will feel comfortable with different lengths of time spent…
The Ability To Judge Less And Love More
It’s interesting to think that no one really knows what we’re like. Only a very few that are close to us will see us through our ups and downs, but no one can live the journey of another. I had a conversation with a friend recently about how people will…
The Misconceptions People Have About Pigs
I grew up in the country side where we had many pets growing up. The day I met Hercules, he was a wee little black and white Kune Kune piglet. Sadly, he was the last piglet left because nobody wanted him. As soon as I saw him, I thought he was…
The Unfolding Nature Of A Quiet Introvert
Many of us tend to show more of our personality the more we become comfortable with a person. I find that there are only a very few handful of people that have ever seen my whole personality, and understand the extent of how odd but loving I am. Truly, I…
Don’t Let Fear Stop You From Your Dreams
This is one of the most important reminders in life that we need. Getting outside of your comfort zone is important, because for a very long time I allowed my anxiety to take over my daily life. Most fear is built up in our imagination. Once we conquer our fear,…
The Lost Art Of Staring Into Space
As I walk into a space, there is often people with their heads down on their phone or laptop. It makes me think about how we don’t see daydreamers as often as we used to, and if you catch sight of one, perhaps you might make eye contact for a…
What Did We Do When There Was No Internet?
When I think back to my childhood, I’m grateful for a time when technology hadn’t been as nearly prevalent in our lives. We weren’t surrounded by a screen for a significant amount of the day, and we cherished the moments of going to the cinema to watch a film or…
You Decide Your Attitude Regardless Of The Situation
This is one of the most important lessons in life. Your attitude determines your choices and how you feel about a situation, and what you want to learn from it. The mind is everything. What you think, you become. We have a choice in what we want to focus on and…
When Do You Feel The Most Like Yourself?
This is such a powerful drawing, the way it expresses so many different messages. When I look at it, it gives me a sense of disguise, pretending to be someone else, changing our appearances, thinking in different ways, seeing things from different minds (and perspectives), the different sides of our personality,…
How To Improve Your Chinese Language Skills
Chinese is one of the most beautiful languages in the world. When you see the words themselves, each of them are like a picture. It is the most spoken language in the world by more than 1 billion people. I remember my Grandmother explaining to my sister and I the…
The Ocean Of Blank Faces Walking In The City
When we walk in the centre of the city, we’re surrounded by strangers and unfamiliar faces. Everyone’s walking towards somewhere for some reason. Sometimes I wonder in my mind, what’s happening in their lives. Amidst all the blank and neutral faces, I can’t always really tell. There’s this distant, emotionless…
What It Means To Be Quietly Confident
There’s a misconception that confidence means being an extrovert, being loud, openly expressive and outgoing. There is this image of someone who is likable, energetic and gets a long with everyone. However, confidence means having faith in yourself or someone else. It’s the state of feeling certain about the truth of…
What Do We Leave To The Imagination?
A beautiful quote from Rei Kawakubo “For something to be beautiful, it doesn’t have to be pretty”. The words are golden because we all have our own perception of what is beautiful, yet somehow when I reflect on what we leave to the imagination as a society, the answer is…
The Common Misconceptions Of Being Soft Spoken
When I think of soft spoken people, I think of Audrey Hepburn, Katie Holmes and Winona Ryder. The thing with the way we speak is that we don’t really hear ourselves. It’s similar in the sense that we don’t hear our own accent. When I speak, I can’t hear how…
The Fine Art Of Not Giving A Fudge
When we care less about certain voices in our minds or the words of others, we become more happy and free. We let go of negative judgment from those we aren’t close to, and we feel unaffected by criticism that has no value to our self growth. It means wearing…
The Beauty Of Walking Long Distances
I recently finished reading a book called A Philosophy of Walking by Frédéric Gros. It was such a beautiful read. It was a peaceful feeling walking to the rose gardens the other day, knowing I’d read a book about walking! If you have ever read Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice…
The Struggle Of Writing What You Can’t Express
Do you ever have those moments, where the thoughts in your mind are not as eloquently expressed when spoken out loud? Perhaps you have a day where you sit down to write in your journal, but the words don’t seem to flow. Your mind is at a pause. It’s the…
What We Talk About When We Talk About Love
I believe the title is originally a book from 1981 by American writer Raymond Carver. There are different types of love. Affectionate love, friendship love, romantic love and spiritual love. Affectionate love expresses the fondness and natural love a parent has for their child. The love we may feel towards…
People Will Judge No Matter What You Do In Life
No matter how successful we are in our lives or how badly we may fall, we will always be judged. It happens no matter if we are striving for something, making a change in our lives or taking action for something. There is a strange peace in knowing that we…
The Most Beautiful Things In Life Can’t Be Seen
The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched – they must be felt with the heart. -Helen Keller. A beautiful reminder that reminds us to place more value on how we can become a better person through our mind and heart. Everything that is…
The Joy Of Spending Time In Your Own World
We’re born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we’re not alone. – Orson Welles. Our bodies are the home we live in for the rest of our lives. Feeling lonely is feeling unwanted and isolated.…
People Come And Go In Our Lives For A Reason
There is a reason why people come and go (or stay) in our lives. When I reflect back on the people I have met over the course of my life, I realise that no matter what the relationship was like with the person, I learned something from it. It’s very…
You Are Such A Beautiful Person
We see the world differently through our own eyes everyday. I feel like there is this part of myself, that wishes I could tell anyone who has ever felt alone, left out, worthless, ugly, hurt or question what their purpose in life is, I wish I could tell them how…
The Healing Power Of Writing
Have you ever felt as if you can’t quite articulate something vocally, the way you may think of it in your mind? Writing everything translates much more fluidly from your mind to your fingertips. Till this day I am not the best at expressing myself fully, the way I may want…
Beautiful People Are Everywhere
Whenever I walk on the pavement of the city streets, I see the strangers walk past me, and know there is so much history in their lives. But, to only catch a glimpse of their faces, there are so many different feelings an expression can give. A sudden laugh can make…
Tip On How To Save Money And Spend Less
Saving money is a great habit to make, whether you want to minimise the things in your life, pay off the bills, save towards a goal, travel the world or invest for the future. Money does provide a sense of financial security that gives us the daily necessities and long…
What The Little Prince Taught Me
Growing up, you may of read The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. As I was sitting in a cafe called Woolloomooloo in Taipei last year with my dear friend, she told me how she was reading the book. It brought back a lot of memories of the book, and…
The Benefits Of Waking Up Early
As someone who is a morning person, I have seen many benefits in waking up early. Having a good sleep, can increase our productivity, maintain a steady metabolism and encourage good health. It creates a steady pattern in our lives and is an important and significant step to becoming a…
Tien-Jen 